Ignorance Abounds

It never ceases to amaze me the level of ignorance perpetuated daily. Whether it’s the lack of basic rules of the road, or basic personal courteousness, I’ve decided that as much as I love them, PEOPLE ARE CRAZY!! 🙂

Take the guy at my local Staples store. I walked up to a conversation my friend, an employee of Staples, was having with an acquaintance. His comments were the most stereotypical I’ve ever heard. They went something like this: “All of these people driving these nice cars are dealing drugs. These people with Lexuses [sic] and Infinities . . . they ain’t working.”

I stared at him in disbelief. I asked him to clarify his statement since I wasn’t privy to the initial conversation. I was amazed to hear him repeat his sentiment. He asked if I agreed. I wavered between wanting to curse him and laugh at him. “Sir,” I began. “I assure you that neither my husband and I deal drugs and we have three cars: Cadillac, BMW and Infiniti. We WORK. And legally.” As he began to respond I cut him off and told him that my Daddy, (I’m a Daddy’s Girl!), who cleaned schools to put me through private grammar school also drove an Inifinti.

“Sir,” I asked just before I turned away, “Have you ever heard of SAVING YOUR MONEY??!!”

*DropsMic*
#CompleteIdiot

Auntie Dottie – A Funny Story

My Aunt Dottie was hilarious. Never a driver, she always wanted a ride somewhere, sometimes failing to understand that driving is more than leisurely sitting.  After repeatedly making a request of her son, Eric to take her somewhere, despite his protests that he was tired, she replied, “FINE!! Call me a cab!”

A short pause ensued with Eric replying, “Okay, you’re a cab.”  Even Dottie had to laugh.  That was the funniest anecdote told at her homegoing service.

🙂

 

 

From the Mouths of MORE Fools

Here we go again readers! More stupid comments about babies. This time, the buffoonery was not directed at me. This time, the comments were about having too many babies! LOL.

People never cease to amaze me. I still LOVE people – in spite of themselves. My cousins are fantabulous (fantastic and fabulous) people and especially fantabulous parents.

I won’t reveal their names, but those of you who know me will identify them by reading further. Back in 2004, the wife was pregnant with their fourth child.

The scene:
We were at a funeral burying yet another uncle – the 5th. We are grieving, trying to support each other when a relative opened her mouth without thinking.
Imagine being very pregnant, trying to be a support base for your husband, mother-in-law, and kids, all while trying to hold it together yourself. You just walk your kids out of the parlor that contains the body of one of the coolest uncles ever, to be greeted with “Why y’all keep having all these kids?”

EXCUSE ME?! My cousin handled it with the grace of Michelle Obama and Jackie O. She walked away – fuming, but with class and dignity.

You’d think the stone face and lack of response would have caused this relative to stop and think, “Hmm, that probably wasn’t appropriate.”
No, my friends! On the contrary, when she didn’t get a response from the wife, she asked the husband.

Now, remember in my first post, I told you that we play The Dozens for sport. For the most part, no subject is off limits. The husband’s response?

“Well, if you all would quit dying off, perhaps we wouldn’t feel the need to repopulate the family.”

Callous? Perhaps.  Not as much as her question was nosy.

I wish I’d been around to ask if she wanted some salt to go with her foot, but alas, I was busy emceeing my uncle’s homegoing service.

It’s not like this couple is in financial dire straits. They never ask for favors or handouts. In fact, even with their 4 children, they are looked at FIRST when the rest of the family needs some duckets.

So what gives one the nerve to ask such personal questions? I don’t know. Some say when you get older, the censor in your brain doesn’t work as quickly, allowing you to say whatever comes to mind. Perhaps, but this relative was not that old, and to this day, has no problems in the cognitive area.

I call it meddling. It reminds me of a joke I heard from a single woman:

I got tired of my aunts pointing, snickering and saying to me at weddings, “You’re next! You’re next!” They only stopped when I started to return the favor at funerals.

Imagine that!

Suppose You Thought First, THEN Spoke

I am a newlywed. Anyone who knows me knows that I have a natural maternal instinct and LOVE babies and children to a fault. I’m an educator and a journalist, which allows me to blend my love for children with my love for information. But is there such a thing as too much information? Of course! That’s how the acronym “TMI” was born. Some people give too much information. But what is worse, in my humble opinion – of course, is when people REQUEST TMI.

But back to my maternal feelings. My husband and I have been asked on numerous occasions, “Do you want kids?” or “When are the babies coming?” These questions are fine. They are natural. I deem them to be outside of the realm of TMI. (That’s of course, unless you ask me weekly.  I mean really…, SHUT UP!) But worse, there are those callous individuals who don’t think before they ask dang questions, such as, “Girl, why you ain’t pregnant yet?”

Sidebar: The Clopton Clan is a family in which you’d better be quick on your feet. We play “The Dozens” for sport. Most subjects are fair game – unless they are egregiously malicious. I’ve had 32 years of verbal sparring practice, so be careful what you say to me.

Now that you’ve gotten a peek inside how my mind works, you’ll understand the restraint with which I had to politely proceed. I gave this person some answer that my Grannies would have been proud of, when what I really wanted to say was, “Hell, when are you NOT going to be pregnant?” See how that question is none of my business, just as the one that she posed wasn’t any of hers?

What if my husband and I were having problems conceiving? I mean, that’s not the case, but what if it was? Do you think this Miss Callous would have felt incredibly stupid had I said with a straight face, “Oh, I can’t have babies…, but thanks for reminding me of that after I’d just stopped crying for the first time this week.”

Yeah…, quite unfeeling and inappropriate…; I think so too!

Miss Callous had competition though. A distant relative, (one who with her 3 close relatives, RSVP’d for my wedding, and then didn’t even show up! Can you tell I’m still perturbed?), actually asked me, “Girl, what’s the matter, is your husband shooting blanks?”

A lot of words ran though my mind. They were neither polite, nor Christian-like. I ended the conversation thinking about the MANY personal insults that I could have directed her way. I had to repent to the Lord for even THINKING the things that I thought. (Hold on: I am repenting again!)

Again, what if my husband were having difficulty? The nerve!!!

Advice columnists recommend a blank stare for such absurd questions; the neighborhood I grew up in advises violence. In this case, 1.) we were on the phone, and 2.) violence is not my thing. (And besides…I’m too pretty for jail.)

My simple point is this: unless you are an OB/GYN, don’t be overly concerned with other people’s reproductive health. You run the risk of unnecessarily hurting feelings, or causing stress, and in the case of someone who’s not as nice as me, perhaps getting told off or punched in the mouth.

Blessings,
Tasha